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Post by Deleted on Nov 28, 2020 4:48:54 GMT
The reality is helping them learn things like self-control is a job. No matter how much a parent loves a child, if the child screws up as an adult the parent will share the blame.That is so true Cameron. One of my courses was called "The Psychology of Crime." In so many instances the parents were blamed when their kids went bad. Impossible not to blame the parents of serial killers who cut up people and put them in the freezer. It's also impossible not to think what the heck, what did they do to him for him to go around raping women, or, they must have raped him that's why he turned out to be a pedophile.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 28, 2020 4:54:23 GMT
I have three grandchildren via my oldest son and odds are I'll never meet any of his dotters. I was lucky enough to have three young children this time around, and odds are I won't last long enough to see them have children. The reality is helping them learn things like self-control is a job. No matter how much a parent loves a child, if the child screws up as an adult the parent will share the blame. The hardest job, but makes life worth living.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 29, 2020 4:14:37 GMT
The reality is helping them learn things like self-control is a job. No matter how much a parent loves a child, if the child screws up as an adult the parent will share the blame.That is so true Cameron. One of my courses was called "The Psychology of Crime." In so many instances the parents were blamed when their kids went bad. Impossible not to blame the parents of serial killers who cut up people and put them in the freezer. It's also impossible not to think what the heck, what did they do to him for him to go around raping women, or, they must have raped him that's why he turned out to be a pedophile. Absolutely true Maggie. i remember one case we studied in detail, Fred and Rosemary West. Their parents were undoubtedly to blame for the West's awful crimes. Yes parenting is a hard job. I'm so glad that my two children turned out to be worthy citizens.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 29, 2020 11:39:47 GMT
Impossible not to blame the parents of serial killers who cut up people and put them in the freezer. It's also impossible not to think what the heck, what did they do to him for him to go around raping women, or, they must have raped him that's why he turned out to be a pedophile. Absolutely true Maggie. i remember one case we studied in detail, Fred and Rosemary West. Their parents were undoubtedly to blame for the West's awful crimes. Yes parenting is a hard job. I'm go glad that my two children turned out to be worthy citizens. All a parent can hope for. Good people.
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Post by Retread-Retired-Cameron on Nov 29, 2020 12:31:55 GMT
Absolutely true Maggie. i remember one case we studied in detail, Fred and Rosemary West. Their parents were undoubtedly to blame for the West's awful crimes. Yes parenting is a hard job. I'm go glad that my two children turned out to be worthy citizens. All a parent can hope for. Good people. Human psychology isn't quite as binary as is often believed. People who had horrible childhoods due to parents and environment grew up to lead exemplary lives. People who had some of the best parents and environments grew up to live monstrously.
After everything is said and done all any parent can hope for is they did their best and the child takes it from there and does his / her/ zir best.
This is why one of the early lessons for our children involve the importance of self-control. It's okay to be happy, sad, or angry, it's what we do as a result of those emotions that defines us.
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Post by BlueAndGold on Nov 29, 2020 14:02:28 GMT
Agreed.
You can't lay 100% of the blame on the parents. Some kids (people) are just born ornery with a particularly evil streak. Some of us get lucky with our kids. Others don't. As parents, we just have to do the best we can for the little sprouts then send them on their way.
They our messages to the future but sometimes the postman gets lost.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 29, 2020 18:10:57 GMT
All a parent can hope for. Good people. Human psychology isn't quite as binary as is often believed. People who had horrible childhoods due to parents and environment grew up to lead exemplary lives. People who had some of the best parents and environments grew up to live monstrously.
After everything is said and done all any parent can hope for is they did their best and the child takes it from there and does his / her/ zir best.
This is why one of the early lessons for our children involve the importance of self-control. It's okay to be happy, sad, or angry, it's what we do as a result of those emotions that defines us.
Yes, you can't control any situation or event, but you can control how you react to it.
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